If I were a unicorn.

Today I saved my old blog from doom by downloading the entirety of it (2002-present) onto my computer. At first I thought I would slowly import old blogs into this one and date them retrospectively (see labels: retrospective posts) but that got old, and now there are only a few, very random posts from the past, not at all indicative of my general mindset or state of being during those times. Now it exists only as a massive, dense block of unformatted text with smatterings of html tags throughout. I bet my children will be doing nothing short of clamoring to read it.

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I'm always super annoyed by people on the elevators at work. Perhaps today more than other days, because for the past week or so I've been exhausted and in a fog. But the thing is, there are at least eight elevators in our particular bank of elevators, servicing only floors 6-16. Thats more than one elevator per floor so WHY THE @#$% DOES EVERYONE NEED TO JAM INTO THE SAME ELEVATOR?! I know I should be a dutiful office citizen and hold the door for people who are too fucking lazy to call themselves an elevator and wait for it, but I don't. There I said it. I don't hold the elevator. I'm not even one of those people that will stand behind the closing doors and say "OOPS!" loud enough so the person who is left behind will at least think you tried.

Here's what came up when I googled "crowded elevator"...discuss:


The lumberjack depiction is pretty much my favorite, but the toy unicorn spearing what appears to be hitler is definitely a close second. If only the hitler doll was instead the middle aged secretary who today said "beep beep beep!" as she literally backed into the crowded elevator, and the unicorn doll was myself, then indeed the second depiction would be an accurate presentation of a "crowded elevator." Yes, maybe we SHOULD install a back-up warning horn on you so we can all be on the lookout for you when you back your ass into the elevator.





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