Today is absolutely crawling by at an excruciating rate. I've even been busy, which usually helps the time go by, but no dice. I'm suffering.

Yesterday went by super quick, however, because I did THIS:

www.katefenwick.com

Need a photographer? If I make enough as a photographer I will not have to suffer through days like this anymore. So if you need one...I'm your girl.

Too bored to write.

Normal Husband-like behavior.

Anyone who knows me as of late knows how much I hate elevators. I have special disdain for the people on the floor below me because EVERY TIME I get on the elevator, thinking I'm gonna be able to just ride up to my floor, one of those annoying hippie architects has to come rushing up and stick their little messenger bag full of blue prints or what have you in the door. Why are these people wasting my time? Can't they just walk up eight flights of stairs? KIDDING. Kinda. I think I would be a lot more tolerant if the first six floors weren't used as parking, and therefore not an issue. But because of that, the seventh floor is the only thing between me and a stop-free ride to my office every morning.

Also, this afternoon a lady got in and had that annoying habit of smacking her lips and swashing her saliva around in her mouth for no reason. She also felt it was necessary to stare blatantly at my shoes the entire time. I tried to back into a corner and pretend I was invisible but no dice. She just turned around and kept staring. How are these people even functioning in the real world? What is it about the elevator that makes people act like rejects? Honestly.

Anyway, enough about that.
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I read this other girls blog today and it inspired me thusly:

LOVE: this gorgeous, fall-like weather
HATE: the horror-movie-esque number of fleas that come with it.

LOVE: my job
HATE: being the lowest person on the totem pole here.

LOVE: C
HATE: that he can't find a job that will get him money while he's furloughed.

LOVE: ice cream
HATE: that theres free ice cream that I can't justify having in the lobby

LOVE: my job
HATE: STILL not having enough money to buy myself things.

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Speaking of the ice cream social in the lobby, I wasn't sure what was going on until the elevator came and an absolutely inane number of secretaries, etc (all women -- draw your own conclusions) got off and went streaming for the ice cream. I'm talking about like thirty women at a time. It was insane.

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All in all, this hasn't been the best day ever. It hasn't been the WORST day, but it definitely could have been better. I will now interrupt this blog entry for a healthy dose of Feeling Sorry For Myself (FSFM):

• This morning my now ex-roommate once again displayed an unnecessary level of asshole-ity. He of course can suck my proverbial wang, but it still made me blindingly irate mad.
• Thinking that the shoes I wanted to wear were in my car already, I left the house without shoes on, only to arrive at work with no shoes. So for the first half of my day I had to wear a pair of shoes that had been in my trunk probably since like 1999 (incidently, the last time they were in style was probably 1999 as well) and also looked like I had pulled them out of a dumpster to boot.
• Then when I got back from lunch I had to pee BAD, so I ran into the bathroom, but the hook on my slacks was welded shut by dragon fire or something, and I could NOT get my pants off to save my life. Sooooo that sucked.*

*Yes, I did eventually get my pants off without the use of the jaws of life.

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I realized I haven't reviewed the latest gem on Yahoo Answers lately, so here it is:

Is this normal for A Husband?

I find my Husband Dunkin with his member in a bird feeder! I find him with it in a hole in the wall of in our den! I found him with it in a doughnuts when we buy them from Dunkins Doughnut'! He even has placed his member into a drain in our bathtub!

Im afraid if he sees a gofer hole he might place his member into it and get bit! I feel it is a danger for him to be doing this, how should i tell him to stop?

blog OBSESSED.

Lately I find that I'm a little obsessed with my blog. Something great happens and normally I'd call my mom or C, but recently (and by recently, I mean, in the last week or so) the first thing I think is "I have to tell my BLOG." Really, who is even reading my blog? No-one probably. I'm rushing to tell a server somewhere about my life. I feel like sometimes I can read over my past blogs (and keep in mind, the majority of my blogging (2002-present) resides elsewhere on the internet and is not part of the work related drivel contained herein) and in a sense they are talking back to me. In the sense that I read them and they say "can you believe you actually thought people might care about this angsty bullshit at one time?" I'm banking on the fact that someday sheer volume of posts will culminate in some sort of complete, rich Portrait of a Blogger as a Young Woman.

I wonder how people get into these big networks of bloggers. I notice all the "famous" blogs I read are all linked in with other famous blogs, and they all read each others blogs and have blog bookdeals and attend blog conventions or whatnot.

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Today C went to the dentist for the first time in probably.....ever. I'm exaggerating of course, but it has been a while. Why are men so afraid of the dentist? I've been talking this over with some of my girlfriends, and so far this is a universal trend. This morning all I heard was how the dentist was gonna lecture him and get mad at him, and I'm wondering, what sort of dentists did all of these dentophobic men attend as young boys. I'm imagining a giant conspiracy ring of leather-clad sado-masochistic bondage dentists/dental assistants: "you didn't floss? thats thirty lashes with the tickler for you."

Some guys might be into that though, so thats a good business prospect for all those kinky girls who are also interested in dentistry.

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Abbreviations.com is a great website, and probably not blocked by websense (I was just imagining if it WAS blocked by websense; "Your network administrator has blocked the web category 'abbreviation websites'..." hahahaha) , for anydorkone who's curious about all the things your initials could stand for, or if you're immature like me you'll search "SEX" and "FUCK" and you'll find that the letters "SEX" are actually pretty useful.
For instance:
SEX is the airport code for sembach, germany.
SEX also stands for the Scientific Experimental Xylophone and Sexually Educated X-men.
FUCK isn't that interesting except for there are THREE universities with the acronym fuck, whcih is AWESOME. I don't feel like typing them, but I swear its true.

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I keep trying to open new tabs so people who walk by my office won't be able to read the embarrassing ones ("harrypotterfanfiction.com :: 50,000 HARRY POTTER STORIES" and "What does FUCK stand for?" are the most offensive/abjectly humiliating if you must know.) So now I have 12 tabs open for things like " The New York Times online" and "The Economist" Hopefully people will be so blinded by my largely intelligent web browsing that they will fail to notice my humiliating harry potter story addiction.

Ok, off to work.